FYI I'm a (crap) Spy-per

I don't have much experience playing the Battlefield series, except when I used to play a lot of Medal of Honour at the Internet Cafe, since Battlefield gave me something else to suck at. I enjoyed it quite a lot as I liked using the different vehicles, mainly as offensive weapons. Like my patented "Kamikaze-Air-Bomb Attack", which maintained my perfectly balanced kill/death ratio for a while.

I'd been keeping half an eye on Battlefield Heroes, primarily because I'd been told it was built to run on low-end computers, which to me was a god-send. A laptop with 1.73 GHz can never be classed as a gaming PC. Fortunately, BH only requires 1GHz, so viva la download.

In case you were unawares, Battlefield Heroes is an EA "Play 4 Free" title, meaning the download is FREE, and playing the game is also FREE. The payment comes in the form of microtransactions for cunique clothing, so and so forth. Obviously you don't have to buy anything, so for people like me, it's free =)

After a few starting up issues (like not realising you had to create a character first, and not being able to find a server) I finally got into a real game. It's very hectic, especially at the start when everyone is slamming together in various vechicles, and some idiot decides the best way to get a capture point is to use a bomb on it. But it all works together quite well, despite the graphics not being up to much. Not that it really matters, because it isn't about the graphics at all.

I'd decided to take on the role of a commando, which is essentially a sniper-spy combo, being able to disappear, but also shoot people with a good ol' scoped rifle. It might just be my suckyness, but the knife really doesn't kill people the way you'd like it to. Meh. The sniping is good, especially from the top of a lighthouse. When you are invisible.

There's also a decent levels system where you go through ranks for kills and captures, which then leads to upgrades. It works well, and it's a nice little metagame aspect to it. It also gives you new abilities and access to new weapons, which is good in terms of variety in the long term.

Despite all the good things I've said, Battlefield Heroes probably isn't the game for me. Why? Because I absolutely suck at it. There aren't words to describe how god-awful I am at it. Seriously, there are people who can't even use a computer who are better at the game than me. I seriously am awful. I crashed a plane because I forgot to accelerate. It's hard to explain how bad I am, so here's a visual representation in the form of an Excel graph, an idea I in no way stole from Chris Livingston;



I awarded myself a coupla points there because I did get a few headshots in, but still, these were when I was hidden up a lighthouse, in stealth mode, whilst crouching.

I guess I could blame it on my dodgy web connection that lead me to be running into a wall more than once, but at the end of the day, I just plain suck at it. Oh well. That's not gonna stop me =D