Castle Moars

One of the things I'd never expect to ever do would be to yell out "F***in' Hitler!" in my sixth form common room, but I'd be wrong...

As previously mentioned, I've got Wolfenstein 3-D on my iPod and it's been the only thing I've been playing, bar a coupla Flash games on teh Interweb. I had absolutely no prior knowledge of Wolfenstein, but I doubt story was top of id Software's agenda. You American soldier. Everyone else, enemy. Shooty-shooty.

Two reasons I got this;
1. It's an FPS and I've played a dismal amount of those in the past
2. It's got zombies, and I enjoy shooting zombies

As I played through the first mission, I had a laugh shooting the basic enemies, which I nicknamed Nigels, and then the ones with machine guns, which I dubbed Nehman, after the sound they make when I shoot them. Towards the end of the first mission, I was worried that there weren’t gonna be any zombies, and I got scared when the first boss was not one of the living dead, but a bloke with miniguns for hands, who I called Sponge.

But THEN, zombies started turning up, and I was happy. Weirdly the zombies had machine guns embedded in their chest and fired them by dancing like MJ, but that was alright, because I was shooting them.

As a game Wolfenstein is alright. Sometimes when you are legging it through the corridors you feel like you've stepped into that windows screensaver, but this game only cost 2.99 and originally came out in 1992, so whatever. The gameplay is pretty simple, and it's never really that hard... That said, I have died quite a few times. There are loads of "secrets" in the game, which are basically sliding walls that reveal treasure, or occasionally an enemy, but I seem to have some trouble finding them... Oh well.

But the reason I yelled out the Fuhrer's name was that the third boss turns out to be a bunch of FIRE-BREATHING HITLER CLONES. Weird, I hear you cry, but it gets weirder. You go through a door and, oh, there's Hitler, IN A GIANT ROBOTIC SUIT WITH CHAIN GUNS ON IT! So I'm legging it around, blasting away at him, as I should. I decide for one last push and leap out firing everything I can into him, and hooray! I'm told that I've killed the last enemy, so I relax. BUT THEN! Hitler, the cheating bastard starts shooting at me with more guns! The cad! Who’d of thought you couldn't trust Hitler to fight fair? Honestly...

In conclusion, I like this game. Retro-ness is always good for a chuckle. Oh and it's got Nazi Zombies. Instant Epic-Win.

Also, I've been playing this thing after hearing about on a podcast. It's not a whole lot, but it's an interesting concept and the developer seems to have some good ideas.
Well, until the weekend, stay awesome =)