Ice, The University and Everything

This weekend's installment of "The Starting Village" comes to you live from a brand spanking new location; a small room in a flat to the north of Canterbury!

Yes I have moved. And after soom furious battling with the internet, I established a connection, and got back to what really matters; teh interwebs.

Over the past week, I've been using my laptop a lot more than I normally would. I've downloaded a few demos off Steam (because I have no money and my Xbox is at home), and here's a short sentence for each of them;

- Gish; Jumping is too hard, lighting is nice
- Psychonauts; Good length, if I heard the word punch again I'll explode
- Blueberry Garden; Whiskey Tango Foxtrot?

I've also bought the LucasArts Adventure game pack, or whatever its called, and I've been playing both Fate of Atlantis and LOOM. FoA is very... cheesy, and LOOM... Well in the first 10 minutes of LOOM, all of my friends had turned into swans and my mother turned into a duck and flew through a rift in space time. Yes.

Another thing I've been playing is this, or for those of you who are scared of links, Icycle, a bike game set in an icy apocalypse. Insanely tough and incredibly well designed, it's a great time waster.

Because I'm now using a wired connection, I've been playing more BFH. I still suck, but at least I can get better because I won't have "THERE IS A PROBLEM WITH YOUR CONNECTION" popping up every ten seconds.

Well that's all for now. I'll be doing a "Postcards From..." for all the LA games I just got, but until them, don't feed the Yao Guai, chiiildren!



I miss Fallout 3 =(

Trench Warfare Fun in the Snow

Rejoice, celebrate and so on. After spending a whole half a day bouncing up and down staring out the window, just when I had decided to give up, the postman FINALLY arrived and I literally snatched the parcel from his hands. Maybe a slight over-reaction but I didn't care.

The result of this perplexing display of anti-socialism? I had gained the first two DLCs for Fallout 3, although because they came on a disk, we shall now be referring to them as add-ons.

First up was Operation Anchorage, a military simulation set during the communist occupation of Anchorage, Alaska. After investigating an emergency signal from some Brotherhood Outcasts, I found myself in the middle of a small battle between said Outcasts and some Super Mutants. After reloading my game because I accidentally shot one of the Knights (who decided walking into my line of fire was a sensible strategy) the group and I bested the Muties and moved onward to a Pre-War armoury containing a military simulation of the Anchorage ho-down. After leaping in without a thought for my personal safety, I found myself half way up a cliff with very little in the way of weapons. After receiving some exposition from a cliff-climbing American soldier, I wandered off along the cliff face to shoot some Communists, which cheered me up. Actually that was the second best part of OA; Shooting commies. It's more fun if you shout "Better dead than red!" or something similar every time you shoot them.


Anyway after fighting invisible Chinese ninjas and blowing up some rather large cannons, I found myself in command of a squad of troops, and this was where OA got slightly confused. You are given the option of putting together a squad of soldiers (or robots) to help you in fighting the Chinese, but there doesn't really seem to be much point to it. Allies can be respawned almost instantly, which bears no penalty, so the threat level is minimal. You also get to choose between a rather crap selection of weapon packs, and unfortunately there's no option of Chinese Assault Rifle. As much as I slag off the commies, they knew what they were doing with the Xuanlong.


The long and short of Operation Anchorage is that you get access to a ton of cool armour and weaponry, most prominently, the Chinese Stealth Armour. This is possibly the coolest piece of tech I've seen in pretty much seen in any game ever. Ever. Probably. Invisibility is awesome...

So the end word on Operation Anchorage is that it plays out well, with some odd squad based combat, but worthwhile rewards. Next time, I'll be shouting about The Pitt, and why I think everyone needs an Auto Axe. See y'all then!

So Long, and Thanks for All The... Um...

There comes a time in every person's life when they realise they must move out from under their parents roof and go and live in expensive student housing with a shared kitchen, along with a bunch of people that they've never met before, and then spend the next four years learning about what make living things work like what we does. And also have no money to spend on anything except ASDA's own brand mayonnaise (41 pence a jar). Jesus, what have I done?

So as you may have deduced from my terror induced rambling, I'm leaving home to join the university circus. I'm more worried than... something very worried. Of course, moving away means I'll be living in my own flat (sort of). This means that I wish to even take a television, I would have to pay somewhere in the region of £150, even if I do not watch the wonderful range of BBC programs (that's not sarcasm, I actually quite like the BBC's programming) The knock on effect of this is that I can't use my 360, until some kind of solution to this is found. It's a bit of a kick in the teeth but I really cannot afford a TV licence. I'm just waiting for Scribblenauts. Then things'll be better.

So that's all that. I have a blog waiting in the wings about the first two Fallout 3 DLCs, and I may put that up on Wednesday (maybe, I'll be very busy next week) Till then, keep your eyes on http://www.newbreview.com/

Well it's been fun in South East London, but Canterbury is calling me, and I feel I've outgrown this town.

So, to paraphrase an ex-security guard on a train, I'll see y'all when I see y'all!

Unnecessary Update Column

A skewed look at the week's headlines in the gaming world...

The PS3 sales have gone up either 300% or 999%, depending on who you pay attention to. Sony have released a statement indicating a "300 percent lift in PS3 hardware sales". On top of this, Chart Tracker announced that the sales had rocketed 999% to 40,000 overall sales.
I just want to quickly shoot down all of the Sony fanboys stating this is everybody realising that the PS3 is clearly the best console. The reason for this rise in sales, incredibly enough, is the price cut, and also the fact that the adverts now actually mention what they are selling. Those "this is living" adverts where almost as poor as that original Xbox "life is short" advert.
I guess the positive of this is that Jack Tretton will finally have something else to talk about, because it's getting dull hearing him constantly tell us how incredibley powerful the PS3 is. We know Jack. We all know.

There will be no Halo Natal "until it makes sense" says ODST producer Alex Cutting, following with "...we are not going to produce a gimmicky feature that just takes advantage of motion controls when it doesn't feel right."
It's good to see that MGS aren't going to do a Nintendo on us, but I can't see Natal EVER being right for any FPS, let alone Halo. Unless it can actually scan me pretending to hold an assault rifle, then tracking my finger as I pull the trigger, Natal can't beat dual analogue controls. Even if it could track this, movement would still be an issue. I don't want to have to jog on the spot to avoid laser fire.

Courtney Love, or at least someone on Twitter who may be Courtney Love, is getting up in arms about Kurt Cobain's likeness. Going by the twitter moniker courtneylover79 (which sounds incredible fake, although that of course may be the point), she has stated "FOR THE RECORD I DID NOT APPROVE KURTS AVATAR FOR GUYITARHERO5" which completely goes against Activision's claims that they "secured the necessary licensing rights from the Cobain estate in a written agreement signed by Courtney Love to use Kurt Cobain's likeness as a fully playable character in Guitar Hero 5"
Apart from telling us that Ms. Love talks like a angry twelve year old fanboy, this story also gives us an insight into Activision's business dealings. courtneylover79, who has now blocked her twitter feed from unnaproved followers, states that "i was forced with literally a GUN to sell RIGHTS". Apparently Activision have decided to start holding people at theorectical gunpoint to get hold of lucrative rights. Of course they have.
I'm sure the only reason Kurt is in Guitar Hero 5 is so this sort of thing can appear on the internet.

Wasteland Survival 101

Welcome to the Capital Wastelands, stranger. Here's a gun, here's some irradiated water, and here's a futuristic wristwatch/PDA that can stop time so you can aim at specific parts of your enemies body. Good luck.

So here's the deal with Fallout 3. It's probably the best game I've ever played, hands down. It's atmospheric, it's open-ended, it's brutally realistic (except VATS, but VATS is excellent anyway) it's visually astounding and it's compelling. I know this is an year-old game, but I would say to anyone that hasn't played yet to buy/rent/steal/pickpocket a copy and give it a go.

In terms of genre, Fallout 3 is a survival RPG with some light first person shooter elements. This suits me just fine, because my FPS skills are lackluster at best. VATS is also a brilliant tool for me as it makes aiming, and killing, makes more satisfying. Admittedly, the stats might be off, but nine times out of ten it hits the mark (bad pun alarm)

But what makes Fallout 3 so brilliant (I hear you cry)? The survival aspect of the game is so well implemented, it creates a whole new level of gameplay. Because you have a limit of how much you can carry, your weapon and healing items are limited to only what you carry. Weapons steadily degrade meaqning you have to find, scavenge or buy new ones to keep them in good condition. And almost all healing items you can find give you radiation, which steadily builds up to do damage to your stats.

There are so many things I could talk about in Fallout 3, but a lot of it has been said before. I'm currently at Level 19, and I realise I'm soon going to hit my peak at Level 20, but I'm already looking into getting the DLCs. I'm also on a mission to collect all the bobbleheads, as well as some of the unique weapons, so wish me luck...

What I am trying to say is that Fallout 3 is one of the best games I have ever played, and anyone he thinks otherwise is a FOOL (obscure reference). I'm sure there'll be more posts in the future about F3, especially considering the aforementioned DLCs. But right now I've got a sniper rifle and a violin to find...

See ya at the top of the Washington Monument, y'all!

...and now for something completely different

Oh man this is embarrassing. Remember last time when I said that my brain would be exploding from joy due to the arrival of Fallout 3? Well I can firmly say that my grey matter is still safely encased inside my cranium. Turns out the best time to order things from Amazon is not the Friday before a bank holiday. Go figure.

So there is no new epic Fallout 3 stuff for me to natter on about. Instead... Uh-oh, I have nothing to talk about!

Uh... I beat 'Splosion Man. This officially wins the award for strangest final boss fight ever. For the most part it involves the normal running around dodging attacks stuff, but the way you beat the boss is amazingly inventive and the sequence at the very end of the fight is bizarre. Also, Hardcore Mode is ridiculously unnecessary. Seriously, who would do that to themselves?

I've been playing Battlefield Heroes again, in no small part cause of the new outfit I've got. For a free to play game, BFH is a surprisngly good game. Sure, the lack of maps is annoying, but the vechicles and classes make it interesting, and the RPG elements mix things up. I'm getting better at it too, although connection issues are still a bitch. Check me out, yeah?

I'm so cool. With my jacket, and weirdly shaped legs, and holster I can't use because I use a shotgun.

Fianlly, I used the PC Zone DVD to install The Elder Scrolls II; Daggerfall to my laptop. This was the whole game, for free on the DVD, and as you all well know, I've yet to resist a free game. Unfotunately, I have little to no idea about how to install the game, so the closest I got was clicking a lovely little install button in a lovely little dialogue box with a lovely little dragon in it, and getting absolutely no where swiftly. Richard, if you're reading this, help me please! If you do, I'll buy your magazine forever and also mention it on this blog every week (if I remember to). PC ZONE MAGAZINE IS AWESOME. There, free marketing.

Right, I'm just about out of information, so I'm signing off. If I never do another blog it's because Fallout 3 hasn't arrived and I've topped myself. Although there's equal chance it has arrived, and I can't stop playing it to do the blog. I'm sure I'll be alright.

See ya in The Wasteland, y'all!

Arcade Cavalcade

Most people who play games for hours on end only to get the achievements are often accused of having no life. This hasn’t happened to me yet, but only because I didn’t have a life to begin with. This means I am free to play games non-stop until my eyeballs bleed just to get one achievement.

Now that I’ve cleared that up, I can talk about what I’ve been up to games-wise, and barring the problems I’ve been having with a certain beta game, they’ve all been on that wonderful white cuboid that sits next to my TV and hums loudly whenever it has to do anything. To be more accurate they all have been downloaded from XBLA, which in my opinion is a very good marketplace for downloadable games.

So what’s on the menu for this downloadable feast? Up as a starter, the spellcheckers nightmare, ‘Splosion Man. A 2.5D platforming puzzle set-up, you control an exploding man, surprisingly enough, who uses his ability to explode to blast his way through the levels, turning scientists into meat for some reason. The controls are incredibly simple with analogue stick controlling movement and every other button makes explode, flinging you into the air (having said that, the right trigger makes you “self-detonate”, killing you. I found this out the worst way). You can ‘splode mid air to continue a jump, and ‘splode once more for a third mid-air jump. The game is fairly robust, sporting 50 single player levels and 50 multiplayer modes (I think), although as is the major complaint with this game, they go on for too long and get too hard. Overall, ‘Splosion Man is a good XBLA title. The levels are interesting, the character is very quirky, and the boss fights spice things up. I’d like to see more boss fights in the sequel actually. Take notes, Twisted Pixel.

For a main course, the game I refuse to refer to as a “Metroidvania” style game, Shadow Complex. This game is also a 2.5D platformer, except this time you play as Nathan Drake-alike, Jason Flemming, although from this point on he shall be called Jason Asskicker. The story, inspired by an Orson Scott Card novel and written by Peter David, involves Asskicker and his girlfriend of apparently one day Claire going into some caves, but discovering a group of well-equipped home-grown terrorists who are preparing to cause civil war in the US of A. After Claire is capture Jason fights his way through the shadow complex, risking his life on several occasions to save the girl he’s known for one day. Plotholes aside, Shadow Complex is a good game. At the start of the game, you have a flashlight, climbing gear and a gun, and that’s what makes it so brilliant. As you hang from a ladder and blast a guard’s head in, you feel badass. When you jump off a ledge and punch a guard in the neck, you feel badass. When you fire at someone with anti-riot foam and then fire a grenade at the foam and it explodes, you laugh for a bit, then realise how badass it was. This game should be sold as a badass simulator. Seriously. It’s just a shame that towards the end, the sheer amount of enemies turns the game into more of a run and gun affair. Closing statements; Solid all-round game, few niggles.

For dessert, a classic given a new dressing, it’s The Secret of Monkey Island; Turbo HD Remix, or whatever. Although the game remains exactly the same, this new version features full voice acting, hand-painted HD backgrounds and characters and some smoother animations. First of all, SoMI is my third favourite MI game, after Curse and Revenge. My feelings towards this new game are slightly odd, in that I feel that a bit more work could have been put into it. Some of the voice acting seems weak, and whilst Earl Boen does a fantastic job with LeChuck, some of Guybrush’s lines sound slightly tired. Sorry, Dom... So to summarise, nice to hear the voices in the original, but doesn’t exactly meet my expectations. Here’s to the sequel, an infinitely better game.

So that’s that. I’ve also got the two Fable 2 DLCs but we can cover those another time. Coupla weeks, I dunno. I might do a bit about Fable III as well.
Next time on The Starting Village, I get Fallout 3, then my brain explodes from joy. See ya then!